Self-dialogue
Then suddenly I opened my eyes to find you crossing towards me, in one moment the whole world disappeared, only we remained and this street
For the first time, our eyes meet.. For the first time, you look directly at my face.. And for the first time, I can’t expect anything , I don’t want to expect.. Because I always relied on your actions as I liked and I ended up disappointed .
The steps get closer… and I lose the ability to communicate with any cell in my body, as if I see you through a magical eye. I feel that the hands of fate have reached out to my face and are pulling its tense muscles to draw a smile…The only spot I can focus on is you, getting closer and the scene approaches its end.. You say — Good evening… with a wide smile.. how are you? What’s your news!.. Then you go right and continue your departure as if nothing happened.. just a face I saw somewhere, why do you ask about my news if you don’t want to stop to hear it?
Stuck in a time gap that I can’t escape from.. I remember seeing the bus door open, and I remember how the faces would lower their heads as I passed by them.. I arrive, and go to my room automatically , unconsciously as if someone is leading me like a blind woman showing pity on me…Don’t cry now.. Keep smiling.. I used to tell myself this as I crossed the shore of disappointment every time.
When I arrived, I threw my things down and sat on the edge of the bed, replaying what had happened… I accidentally looked at my mirror and then burst out laughing, I looked like someone who had just come out of a chimney… It seems I had been crying the whole way long without feeling it.
